Are you struggling with your confidence? Whether you are trying to lose weight, start a business, figure out how to raise your kids without 'damaging' them, go back to school, or any number of other things, life can leave us feeling pretty insecure at times.
Today I want to encourage you that God created YOU to be just as you are. He gave you a voice, He gave you insights that others don't have, and HE doesn't want you to be a clone of someone else you may think is 'better' than you. You will find true freedom and confidence is when you embrace all the wonderful intricacies of YOU.
A few practical steps to help your confidence are:
1. Do something and complete it! When you find yourself doing something you have never done before it starts to build confidence. Not to say that you won't ever struggle again, but you will find yourself moving forward in the area you are dealing with. The more you become good at what you are doing the more confident you will be. Every expert was once a beginner, think about something you have been putting off because of fear of failure or lack of confidence and DO IT! (It doesn't have to be perfect the first time! Or ever! Just do the best you can, take action!)
2. Put up 'blinders'. Do you struggle with comparison? Hate your thighs? Think if only you were like 'Mrs. So-And-SO- Perfect Mom/DAD' that everyone around you would be better off?
If this is you and you struggle with comparison you may need to put up blinders. If this happens because of people you follow on social media then 'un-follow' them! There is a fine line between being motivated by someone and finding yourself constantly discouraged that you don't 'measure up' to them. If you have 50+ pounds to lose and all you look at everyday are Victoria Secret models, chances are your confidence isn't going be soaring. If you only have 30 minutes 5x a week to workout but you constantly follow body builders and expect your body to look like theirs, you may be discouraged often.
If you struggle with people you interact with daily, you may need to pull back for a little bit and really get your head on right. Journaling is a great way to process through some of your emotions and comparisons. Sometimes we feel bad and compare because we are feeling guilty that someone is doing something that we wish we were doing. This can either be a wake-up call for us to make a change, or a time to realize you don't actually want to implement whatever 'it' is into your life. If this happens often and it's always over petty things you may need to do some soul searching and find out what is really going on and why you are unhappy with yourself.
3. Guard your thoughts and your words. Self-talk is important. Your sub-conscious hears what comes out of your mouth. When you constantly speak out what a 'loser' you are or how you will NEVER be able to stop ______, your sub-conscious is listening. And it believes you. There is power in your words. This also goes for what you think about yourself. I don't think that 'just' changing your thinking is going to bring you confidence. I think embracing who you are, ALL of you, is the foundational step, and then these things can follow in line to help.
4. Find a mentor or counselor. We all need to have people surround us that can speak truth into our lives. People that can help us process, teach us new things, and help us through the changing seasons of life. This can be a friend, a coach, a pastor, a counselor, or a small group.
*If you don't have anyone in your life that will 'call you on your crap' as I like to say, then you need to find someone. Feeling confident just because everyone agrees with you is not going to help build the deep confidence I am referring to.
5. Exercise! I don't care what program you do or if you count chasing your kids around the park as exercise! (And it DOES count!) Exercise releases endorphins, or 'happy hormones' as I like to call them. There is nothing better to get you out of a 'funk' about yourself then to get your body moving!