Okay- so they aren’t even ‘that’ crazy. But for me they are. I stick to simple and quiet clothing. My eight year old told me they aren’t something I would wear, and I told him he was right. (He also told me not to wear them outside of the house! LOL) But then I told him if I wanted to I could wear them. I mean of course I’m not going to wear them to a wedding but who cares if I wear them for my workouts?! I’m keeping them.
But here’s something deeper that is going on that I really want to talk about…
Gratefulness. What? Seriously? Didn’t you just talk about crazy leggings? Well, yes, but bear with me. You see, back in March I was told that I was looking at a kidney transplant. And even though it was the first time I had heard I had a kidney problem, it was already to the point that I qualified for the transplant. I didn’t freak out (it’s not my MO LOL), but a few days after the news I was nursing my then 6 week old baby and googling what the process of a transplant was like on my ipad. I began to cry. Not because the idea of a transplant scared me, but because as I held my baby I couldn’t imagine anyone else being the primary care taker for him. I couldn’t imagine him sleeping in bed next to anyone else but me. I couldn’t imagine weaning him early just so that I could have a surgery. And that is what made me cry. Thinking of someone else picking my boys up from school, watching their soccer matches, and more. The idea of being on the sidelines of my family for a season, especially with such a little guy in the mix, crushed my heart.
So what do gratefulness and crazy leggings have to do with each other? Well, today my kidneys are up from 16% total function to 23% total function. For that I am SO grateful. Last night I got to be annoyed that my little man wanted to nurse all night and climb all over me as he’s teething and it kept him awake. Today I got to watch both my boys play soccer and follow it with a trip to the beach. Today I got drink more of my herbs which are healing my kidneys rather than take pills to keep my body from rejecting a new organ. And finally, today I wore these crazy leggings that I never would have worn before. Because after so much of my life wondering what others would think or if it’s ‘kosher’ to wear this or that- I don’t really care.
I’ve spent a lot of time wondering and trying to make sure that I’m okay with others. But I’m getting too old for that. (Or wise?) I’m finding a new freedom, and I like it. This isn’t a freedom just for freedom sake. But I feel that this freedom is going to allow me to be more fully whole. To fully be the person that I have the potential to be. So thank you leggings, I will think of freedom when I wear you. I will think, thank you that I am healthy enough today that I can wear you and exercise! And you know what, I might just have to get the hot pink ones too! (They are from Fabletics…)
So here’s to freedom. Be free. Be grateful.